Saturday, November 20, 2010

what is your problem with me being happy?

i just dont understand why people try to hold me back... i mean who the hell are you to try to stand in my way of happiness?!? i am making HUGE changes in my life because i know they are the changes that need to be made. i am letting go of the fake easy friendships and moving on with the people that deserve to be in my life... why is that so hard to understand? i was not rude about it... i was not mean... i just simply stated that i no longer want communication with you and people like you and would appreciate if you would respect that statement. its not my loss that you are no longer wanted here, it is just how life is going to be. i do not need anymore negativity in my life. i want people that will be there for me when i need them, and people i want to be there for when they need me. my life is no longer a one sided give all i can and get nothing back kind of life. i want the same out of my friendships as i put into them. i will not be walked all over or treated like yesterdays news. me and my little girl will be just fine without those people in our lives. just because im not the skinny super model type...yet, doesnt mean im not worth the same as those bitches. i can love and care just as much, if not more, as they can. i deserve better. and i am not settling for what is easy or comfortable. im striving for the best and that will not be easy or comfortable all the time... but i know how to work my ass off and i intend to do so every step of the way! so if you arent here to help me succeed...plain and simple...GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

things im thankful for

i know im supposed to list the things i am thankful for for thanksgiving...but im going to do mine a little early because i can lol.
my beautiful daughter: she is my everything...even tho there are times i want to scream and yell and throw a fit because of her, i still wouldnt change being her momma.
my family: i have come to realize i have the best family i could ask for. sure its a little fucked up some times, its still my family and i love them all. my sister is especially awesome :).
my friends: sure we have had hard times, fights, brawls, and even times when we dont speak but i still love them. i am so happy to have them in my life.
being able to provide for my daughter: i love that i am the one kicking ass and taking names and putting food on the table. i dont need a man to make a living.
my college career: i am kickin college ass! i cannot wait to be done, but i am sure learning a lot and getting experience under my belt.
i am very lucky to live in america and be able to do pretty much whatever i want. i love my life and the only thing i would change about it right now... is the fact that its so damn cold lol